Wednesday, July 14, 2010

I miss my friends!

I got a wonderful email the other day from my college friend Ellie and tonight came a reply email from my other friend Tracy. These two women and I have been through a lot and even though we don't see each other all that often they are very important to me. I don't know why but as I was reading the email I suddenly started crying. I miss my college friends.

One of my best friends from Stevens Point had a birthday today (it was a BIG one! Happy Birthday Traci, don't worry I won't tell how old you are!) and I wasn't there to celebrate it with her. I texted, I called but it isn't the same. I want to be there to give her a hug and have a drink with her. I miss my Stevens Point friends.

I think that could be one of the hardest things about the move we have made to Madison; once again having to start all over when in comes to having friends. We know very few people here. And the saddest part is that I have no idea any more how to make friends. I have gotten up the courage to ask one mom at the library programs to have a play date, we went to the park and it was fun but then I lost her number and she has never called me. I stalk those library programs now just trying to run into her again, I haven't. But even if I did how do you go from a play date during the day to a dinner out or a party with the husbands?

I hope every day that an adult will speak to me; a random hello as we go for a walk, the cashier at a store asking me a question, a mom at the library saying something (ANYTHING!) to me. But most days I talk to a two year old, a six month old and Chris in person. Yes I talk on the phone, I email, I facebook and blog but those are NOT the same.
I want girlfriends in town that I can go shopping with, that I can have come over to ask their opinion about an outfit, paint color or room arrangement, that I can meet for lunch/dinner. I want couple friends that we can get together with on a random week night for dinner or have over for a game night on the weekend. I want friends that we can make big plans with like superbowl parties and birthday parties. But how do you find those friends when I just can't give up an evening of help to let Chris go play in league events where he might meet people. Moms don't seem over eager to make new friends at any of the kids things I have gone to and we aren't in town enough to really seem to be noticed at church?
I know in the grand scheme of things this is a little problem but there is a big part of me that needs to be social, needs to talk about things like politics, sports and current events (to someone other than a person that I know so well I could have the conversation going both ways!), and NEEDS to get out of the house every once in a while for a drink with other adults!

I miss having friends.

I miss MY friends!

4 comments:

Holly said...

I know how you're feeling Abbie. It took me a year of living here in MN before I really got to know neighbors and met people I now call my friends. One of my very good friends became my friend because I ran into her daughters in the neighborhood. I stalked neighborhood events for five months before I ran into them again and finally introduced myself. I realized they lived in Racine before (where Andrew is from) and our daughters were born one day apart. We exchanged emails and I asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee one Saturday morning just to chat. We were both pretty new to the neighborhood and sort of in the same boat. And now our families are good friends (including the husbands).

Just give it some time and you'll meet people eventually. It'll also help once Sam is in preschool. I've met people through there and at least they are other adults to chat with at drop off and pick up time.

amber said...

Aww Abbie...I totally understand what you're feeling. You are such a sweet person, I am confident that you will meet people soon and have a new group of friends in no time. It is hard...hang in there! :)

Anonymous said...

Words cannot express how much I miss you and Ellie! We have gone through so much together - some while we were under the same roof and others when we've been across the state. There's so much in my life that sparks a memory of a moment we had. I am lucky to have a small group of friends here, but it all started with one and snowballed to an amazing group of women I can shop with, share a glass of wine with or watch chick flicks with. Hang in there, give it some time and always be yourself. You never know, there might be someone at that park and library that are in the same situation. ~Tracy

Traci Grabski said...

We miss you too sweetie!!! I appreciate the bday text and call (I called you back, not sure if you got it, I called the new number). It would have been wonderful to have you here for a hug and a drink on my birthday. If it makes you feel better, since you have left, my circle of friends has not changed either. I have one new friend, who coincidentally, is moving to CA in Sept. I think I am cursed, all my friends move away. Well, except for Reno, she and I are in it for the long haul! We both miss you tons though.....we need to plan a visit.